That moment
of looking reality in the face,
and you realize that a certain relationship that stresses you out,
of looking reality in the face,
and you realize that a certain relationship that stresses you out,
might not ever change on this side of eternity.
That moment
of peace with that reality,
when you let go of it.
That moment
of freedom,
of peace with that reality,
when you let go of it.
That moment
of freedom,
when a HUGE weight is taken off of your shoulders.
Yeah....THAT moment.
Yeah....THAT moment.
I just had one of those recently, and it has been quite the journey in getting to
that moment.
If we were all honest, really truly honest, we all have relationships in our life that are at best.....difficult and painful. I have realized this more and more lately as I have talked with various friends, acquaintances, and neighbors. We try to hide those relationships....they hurt so bad and we don't want others to take sides, to judge the situation, or to minimize the problem. We internalize it and figure it must be something wrong with me, because other people don't have these problems. It adds to the guilt and shame we already carry around, because we aren't able to fix it.....no matter how hard we try.
I am generally a pretty easy going, free spirited person. I can get along with anybody. If I have a problem with them, I am able to talk it out, and go on with my life and still have a good relationship with that individual. I don't necessarily feel like in order to have a relationship with someone, they need to agree with me on everything, or I need to agree with them about everything. I think variety is the spice of life, and I love that my life is filled with a huge variety of people! I have always been known to walk away from any given situation with a whole list of new friends. I really can get along with anybody.
That is......all except for 1 person.
One person in my life, I just can't for the life of me seem to have a good relationship with. Sure, we can be civil and friendly towards each other. But, there are some deep deep issues in our relationship. I have no idea why it is, or what it is all over. I've tried talking with them, I've tried bringing a third party, and I've tried having a neutral person help mediate. To no avail. It doesn't matter what I say or do, it is offensive to them and they read into it, and everything is misinterpreted at best. As I mentioned earlier, I've had several conversations with various people lately about the difficult relationships in their lives. One common thing we all share.....conflict is a universal problem, and it hurts terribly.
So, what is our job as Christians in situations like this? How do we respond? What does it look like to have healthy boundaries with these people? As I personally explore these subjects of conflict, forgiveness, and boundaries I hope to share what I am learning. I want to hear from you too! What are your thoughts on this subject? What has been your personal experience in this realm? You can either leave a comment in the comment box for me, or write me a private e-mail to juliedennis@hotmail.com.
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